photo: r. whittaker
One of my first experiences in San Francisco was of being flagged down by a stranger as I drove toward the intersection of Frederick and Stanyan Streets at the edge of Golden Gate Park. My friend Malcolm Hall and I, both college students, had driven up the coast highway from Los Angeles in my 1953 Plymouth. The year was 1965. We were headed toward the Haight-Ashbury.
Maybe forty yards short of the intersection, I saw him standing on the curb, a disheveled young man, not quite in the hippie mold. He was looking directly at me it seemed, and gesturing emphatically with an incongruous grin. As the car moved closer, my expression must have revealed my uncertainty because he nodded his head. Yes. It was me he was gesturing to.
I turned to Malcolm, “Should we?” Malcolm was non-committal.
I pulled over.
The young man walked up to us still smiling and, without a word, pointed again. I stared in puzzlement. At this, he nodded and—as if to clarify matters—repeated the pointing.
“What do you mean?” I managed to ask.
“Donuts!” He said. “Do you guys like donuts?”
I saw it then, a donut shop right ahead of us at the intersection.
Whatever threat this smiling stranger—maybe five foot eight—might represent stemmed more from his assault on my sense of propriety than anything else. Besides, there were two of us.
The hippie revolution was in full flower and things were going on that crossed a lot of boundaries. Wasn’t this, in some basic way, part of the idea?
I parked the car and Malcolm and I walked over to the donut shop with our new friend. Taking a cue from him, it would seem nothing could have been more exciting than getting some glazed donuts and maybe a coffee together - the three of us! This was something I could never have dreamt up on my own, an adventure both too banal and too transgressive in its way.
Walking in, we found a booth and sat down, Malcolm and I facing the stranger.
“What’s your name?”
"Laurie."
That’s a girl’s name, I couldn’t help thinking. “How do you spell that?”
Laurie just stared at me with his big smile, and nodded.
He had a scraggly beard and his teeth were uneven.
“How do you spell that?” I asked again.
“L-a-u-r-i-e.” The smile remained along with his direct gaze on us both. He didn’t seem uncomfortable, at least.
“Do you live around here?”
An awkward conversation continued for a few minutes and then he said, “Let’s get some donuts. Don’t you guys want some?”
“Sure.” I said, getting up. “How about some coffee?”
I don’t think I’d ever met a street person before. In 1965 I’m not sure that phrase had even come into usage. There were tramps and bums and, by then, beats, beatniks and of course, most immediately, hippies. But in Laurie’s case, no category quite seemed to fit. This was a situation I’d have to face without them.
Struggling to relate as we ate our donuts, we swapped basic information. We told him we were visiting and would be heading back to LA in a few days.
"Oh, could you drop me off in Monterey on your way south?
We told Laurie we’d check in with him on our way out of town, and he scribbled an address on a slip of paper.
The conversation hitched along. When it faltered, Laurie just looked at us with a silent grin, not making small talk to smooth things out. When we finished our donuts, I was happy to escape.
When the morning came to head back to LA we found the address, a boarded-up house. Was that possible? A mistake? Finally, I walked up to the house and pulled back a piece of plywood. “Hey Laurie!” I shouted into the shadows. After a couple of tries an answer came back from the shadows and, sure enough, Laurie appeared.
“You guys! Wow. I can't believe you remembered. Come in.”
Enough light was coming in ahead of us to permit seeing a dilapidated couch, an old coffee table and a couple of chairs.
“Wow,” he said, and just looked at us. “You guys actually came back.”
I couldn’t help wondering what routines of betrayal put our simple act in such a light.
“Hey, would you guys like to listen to some of my songs?”
“What about Monterey?” I asked.
No, he couldn’t go down there today. But did we want to hear some of his music?
Where I come from, you don’t refuse certain things and this seemed like one of those moments. Laurie disappeared and returned with an old acoustic guitar. His singing wasn’t so good. That was my first reaction. But as I listened something else came in, a feeling. It’s what I remember most.
He finished his song and said, "I've got a tape of more of my songs." Reaching for an old cassette player, he said, “Hey, wait here. I’ll be right back,” and disappeared into the darkness of the abandoned house.
Malcolm and I sat listening to the tape player's tiny speaker. Yes, the same quality I'd heard before was coming through. If I had to pick one word for it, it would be heartbreaking.
My encounter with Laurie, as brief as it was, left unforgettable impressions. Moreover, by a twist of fate, it was not the last I’d see of him. In fact, it was just the beginning.
THREE YEARS LATER
By 1968 I’d lived in San Francisco for two years and had recently moved in with a woman I’d fallen in love with. In North Beach, she’d cut quite a figure. Besides being tall and beautiful, she’d become a bit of a celebrity among the locals. One of the characters Karen had become friends with was named Laurie Seagel.
“You know Laurie?” I asked in astonishment. “Laurie Seagel?”
Karen and I lived at the top of Vallejo Street on Telegraph Hill and I began to run into Laurie regularly. Sometimes we had Laurie over for dinner along with street poet Johnny Woodrose, who I’d met while running a poetry program in the basement of a church near Haight St. Before my move to North Beach I’d occasionally seen Laurie at free concerts in Golden Gate Park where The Jefferson Airplane, Buffalo Springfield and Big Brother and the Holding Company with Janis Joplin often performed for free. Laurie sometimes jumped up on stage and tried to grab a mike to join in on harmonica. His harmonica playing wasn’t any better than his guitar playing, but he seemed unfazed by such considerations. He’d always get ushered off the stage, but I couldn’t help noticing that the band members all seemed to know Laurie and never seemed much upset with his antics.
A longer account of my friendship with Laurie is for another time. But his freedom from worry about what others might think is one of his qualities I remember most clearly. It was something I witnessed time and again in many different ways. Perhaps this quality struck me so much because of my own lack in that regard. There were many other things I learned about him that surprised me. He’d been a gifted philosophy student at Stanford University and related amazing stories about his time spent with Gregory Bateson’s family, Richard Alpert and others.
From time to time, Laurie would say something with a strong inflection of Zen. I remember asking him about it. Yes, he used to love being around Suzuki Roshi, the head of the San Francisco Zen Center. He told me about having a meal there one day. The monks were having a silent lunch and he managed to join the group, but Laurie wasn’t interested in keeping the silence. He kept attempting conversation with the monks sitting at table with him. Finally one of the monks complained. "If he’s going to talk, why can’t the rest of us?" Suzuki replied, “For Laurie, it’s allowed.”
Laurie was a man impossible to classify.
Given his talents, whatever obstacles stood in the way of conventional success must have been powerful. But the most obvious problem he faced was addiction. He’d been shooting up amphetamines at least since I’d first met him in 1965. He’d suffered from hepatitis at least once if not two or three times. Listening to his stories, I learned that he’d been arrested several times, too. He’d been severely beaten at least once while in jail by another inmate and had also been beaten more than once by police. He went through difficult times, but was always far more dangerous to himself than to anyone else. By 1968 the years of physical abuse were showing up in mental as well as physical symptoms. Laurie’s future appeared grim indeed.
Then one day, I got a call from Laurie. He’d been in Napa State Hospital detoxing and now was out. Somehow he’d managed to get an airline ticket to Israel. “It’s my last chance,” he told me. "Could I borrow a sleeping bag from you?
I wondered if it was a flight of fancy, but a few days later, Laurie showed up at the door. I handed over the sleeping bag, we embraced, and I wished him the best of luck.
Laurie did go to Israel. He joined a Kibbutz. A year later, I got a letter from him. He had married a beautiful Israeli, Talilah. He’d become a social worker. Why didn’t I come over and visit? As the next few years passed, I got more messages. First there was one child, Hadar, then Sagi then a third. I have forgotten the name.
Then a few years later, I got a call from Talila. Laurie had died from liver failure. She told me a story about Laurie’s social work in Israel. She told me how hard it was, the low pay. He worked with addicts and others, and was much loved, she said.
People thought he had mysterious powers. She told me of a woman who wanted to have children. She had tried everything. No luck. But one day Laurie met with her and held her hand. "You are going to have children," he told her. "Don’t worry."
Shortly thereafter, Talilah told me, the woman conceived. She did have a child.
I don’t remember exactly when Laurie gave me a copy of a manuscript he’d written, All Men Shall Be Gods, but I still have it. For years, I’ve wanted to publish a particular section from it, a remarkable account of an experiment in living he carried out in San Francisco in the early 1960s before he fell under the sway of amphetamines.
I feel compelled to underline how striking I find his singular inquiry to have been. It's an ontological adventure that could easily have remained untold and I'm grateful, finally, to be able to share it with others. Here is that excerpt.
Laurie Seagel writes:
I decided to try to find out what were man’s basic needs. I would live without most things I was accustomed to and see what it would be like. I decided to give up words; I would only say “yes,” “yes” to every question, nothing more, a nod of the head would usually suffice. I would give up things; sandals, a thin shirt and a thin pair of pants would be enough. I knew I could adjust to temperatures in San Francisco through bodily relaxation. The fewer clothes the better; I would worry about changing when the need arose. Nothing in my pockets, nothing, no money, no identification, nothing. And no place. I would break the habit of thinking “where” and “where to?” All places would be equal. I would try to learn to be comfortable anywhere.
I hid a sleeping bag in the bushes near Coit Tower, the highest point on Telegraph Hill, though I ended up sleeping in it only once. The rest of my belongings I hauled over to the family home in Oakland.
Usually, I wore a hat pulled down low. I sat, relaxed my body, and watched, or listened—looked and listened. I sat in Cassandra’s, in the Coffee Gallery, the Bagel Shop, The Place—these were the main gathering spots for people I knew. There was also the Cellar Jazz Club, evenings. Still later some nights after the Cellar closed, we sojourned across town to the Black Fillmore district where jazz was played until early morning at Jimbo’s Bop City. Or I’d go off by myself, as most of the others went home.
When Cassandra’s closed, I’d cross the street where a small cafe was good for a short stop. The small hours of the morning, three to five, I’d spend in a variety of regular ways. Lying among the empty bins in the Italian bakery on Grant just above Green, I watched the bakers working, kneading, arranging, shoving the long rows of loaves into the great oven—rhythm, movement, fire and quiet Italian talk. I enjoyed the warmth and the smell, enjoyed watching them work, like a dance it was—and they always welcomed me. I was a spectator whose enjoyment in watching them heightened their own enjoyment in the work. Invariably one of them would thrust a fresh loaf of bread upon me when I rose to leave.
Another activity for three to five in the morning was walking through the bustling, bright and raucous produce market located then at easy walking distance from North Beach. My eyes delighted in the colors of the fruits and vegetables, and I felt energy from the surging of the men and their machines, the helter-skelter of it all. Here too, people got used to seeing me among them. I was always silent and happy, smiling from the delight my eyes were beholding. I was joyous watching the beauty of existence. Here in the produce market people called me “wolf-man,” I suppose because my hair was long and shaggy, but they always acted toward me with friendliness and offered me fruit, which I ate.
When I was especially tired, during these pre-dawn hours and at other times also, I went into rhythmical walking, sometimes for long distances around San Francisco, long rhythmical strides, arms swinging. The action sort of turned me on, got me high, rested me.
Every day, before the sun rose, I climbed to the top of Telegraph Hill somewhere alongside of Coit Tower, to sit and meditate. From my spot, all the sounds of the bay down below me in an arc left, right and center rose up directly, undisturbed by any edifice. I sat, relaxed deeply, deeply, and listened, watched. The sounds of the ships, of the city, of the birds were pleasant to me. I enjoyed them every day, day after day, for hours at a time. When I began hearing the coarser hum of human voices—tourists appeared about nine in the morning to look out on the bay—I lay down where I was and slept for a few hours. I liked sleeping in the sun.
When I awoke, I usually went to Washington Square Park, or down through Fisherman’s Wharf to Aquatic Park. On the grass of Washington Square, or the sand of Aquatic Park, I’d catch some more sleep in the sun, sometimes swim in the bay at Aquatic Park, eat raw fish at the wharf, or I would sit and watch, listen, or be together with friends— “beatniks” we were beginning to be called after Chronicle columnist Herb Caen put together Kerouac’s “beat” with the “nik” from the Russian “Sputnik.”
Looking and listening were for me ways of quieting my mind, teaching it to not think, breaking habits of thought like: what to do? where to go? But after awhile, looking and listening became something much more; I came to see and to hear the world, existence, more and more acutely. The more I watched and listened, the more I saw and heard, more keenly, more distinctly.
Every day I gained more and more pleasure from this listening and looking, always seeing and hearing more clearly. As time went on, I appreciated how glorious and beautiful existence is, living. I saw how busy, preoccupied were most people with doing, making. Existence was already so much to enjoy, so grand and lovely, so exquisite. Just to see, to hear the sights and sounds that were there made me happy and delighted. I was truly happy and at peace. Everywhere. All the time.
Throughout those eight months, or a year—I’m not sure exactly how many months went by—I had not the slightest inkling of trouble of any kind. The two policemen on the beat, when they passed me they said, “Hi Laurie,” and that was that. I did what I wanted, when I wanted to, sometimes with others, but most often alone. I roamed freely, drank lots of water, ate enough somehow and was always serene in enjoyment of the beauty of all I saw unfolding before me, day into night, night again into day: the warmth of the sun, the cool breezes, the fog, the wind, the sea, sky and stars, trees, flowers, children playing, old people, young mothers with their children, the Chinese, the Italians, the French, the Basque.
My attention became so keen I saw in crowded coffee shops and meeting places, how people’s bodies reacted to each other’s without their consciously knowing it.
When I sat at a live jazz session, my hearing was so sharp, it was like what poets call “a sensitive ear in the audience.” I would hear each particular instrument, separately. The musicians told me that when I listened, they began to hear themselves more distinctly, then each heard the other, and the music grew in intensity and those jam sessions were really something else… at the Cellar, and on weekends, at the Coffee Gallery.
It was all a part of that community spirit which existed, the spirit that both allowed me to be on “this trip” and to live freely in the midst of it. The life of North Beach nourished me, fed my spirit and my body. It was fun to be with this happy throng, to share with them the sounds of talk, laughter, music, nature, the clanging of the cable car bell, the sound of the seagulls, Sonny’s saxophone, Max’s bass fiddle, Bill Wiesjon’s piano, Chuck Taylor’s drums.
What are the basic needs of man? What did I learn during this time? I lived very contentedly on almost nothing. I required little sleep and little food. I drank water copiously, had abundant sunshine, walked and ran tremendous amounts, meditated, rested much, did not feel the need for sex, though I enjoyed frequent human companionship, or at least proximity.
I came to regard my needs as so scant that you could say that what you need is what you want. Air, water, rest, exercise, a little food, this is all I seemed to need.
I did have an acute sense of something like regret or sorrow that other people were not enjoying existence as much as I was then. If only they could sit more quietly and look, listen, feel. I felt that people could live better that way and that society would be better, life would be better that way. But I didn’t talk. I didn’t think I could start talking and somehow teach people to be that way, change the world.
When I finally did decide to end this period, I just hoped that somehow, some way, I could express what I had experienced and learned and somehow bring some of it back into existence, at least into my own existence, and perhaps for others as well…
Richard Whittaker is the founding editor of works & conversations and West Coast editor of Parabola magazine
TO OUR MONTHLY NEWSLETTER
Share Your Comments and Reflections on this Conversation:
On Jun 29, 2023 Kat wrote:
What do you think?This is the comment from Laurie's son I found when I was reading through all the replies:On Jun 10, 2016 Aaron White wrote:
I am so overwhelmed by this article. I did not know of it's existence until recently (a few weeks ago). Wonderful writing -and thank you Richard Whttaker !! I am a son of Laurie Seagel's. My name is Aaron White and I was born in Indio California in 1960. My birth name was actually "Aaron Vincent Seagel" ... later (@ 3 years old) I was adopted by a stepfather...'Paul White'. Laurie had met my birth mother in San Francisco. I am 56 know, and have just returned from a trip to LA where I met two half brothers 'Laurie's' for the first time... along with his sister, Leila Price... an amazing and wonderful experience!! I've often wondered throughout my life...why am I so spiritually oriented...etc?...(also growing up during the '70s)...Well... one can imagine I suppose...not wanting to divulge too many details ??!! But I have here with me (sent to me a few years ago by his sister) a copy of that manuscript Laurie had written from which an excerpt is here in Richard's article. In it's entirety -- it is absolutely "Mind-Blowing" !! What an exceptionally intelligent and deeply perceptive man was Laurie Seagel !! And a gifted writer also !! I wish I could share the whole thing with you all right here!! But thank you again Richard -- for this awesome share you have done with the world !! I am proud to be (though I'd only briefly met him once) a son of Laurie Seagel !!
On Jun 29, 2023 Kat wrote:
Thank you, Richard Whitaker for posting this beautiful story of a beautiful human. Today, I came upon the obituary for Aaron Vincent Seagel White (son of Sylvia Vince and Laurie Seagel) He passed away in Portland, Oregon on or about September 14, 2022. I wonder if he ever published Laurie's manuscript in full. I would certainly love to read it. (see link)On Apr 3, 2023 Steven Crisp wrote:
Thanks again for this Richard. It's the 3rd or 4th time I've read your story about Laurie, and each time I see something new, because of what has since changed in me.Laurie lived this period of his life not unlike a monk, and his begging bowl was his infectious smile on his daily alms walkabout. So little is needed to see the truth: reality as it really is. And when seen clearly, without the lens of good and bad, or what's in it for me, it becomes mind-bendingly awesome. In fact, it seems obvious that less is more in that regard. Less talking, less thinking, less responsibility, less desire, less concern, and less self.
Stripping away (or cutting through) everything that is not essential, can facilitate an opening to reality as it is, its flux and flow that is, of course, all that we are, too. Laurie's 8-month experiment was fascinating; and the causes and conditions were just right for him to play his part in the dance.
I'm sure I'll be drawn to read this another time, Richard, as the river of life carries me along its journey. Thank you again for sharing your stories and insights, and putting them out into the cosmos.
On Mar 25, 2023 Richard Ciccarelli wrote:
I lived in North Beach 20 year after this and befriended a man who hung out on the benches and grass of the park and shared many stories. If I had been there in the late 60's I'm sure I would have met Laurie too. What a beautiful and interesting tale.On Feb 25, 2023 Abby Wasserman wrote:
A beautifully written (both your narrative and Laurie's writing) and a very clear-eyed story of what it can mean to open oneself to someone even while questioning if it is the wise thing to do. Thank you, Richard. I'm glad to have known Laurie through your eyes.On Sep 7, 2022 Mary Frank wrote:
Thank you very much for this story. I lived in North Beach during this time. Many good memoriesOn Dec 30, 2021 E Dillingham wrote:
My life is simple enough that I can listen, look and feel more. Thank you so much for sharing this story. A gift for entering the new year.On Nov 2, 2021 Craig C Downer wrote:
Really appreciate this article as one who also greatly appreciates San Francisco and the Bay AreaOn Sep 6, 2020 Brad Newsham wrote:
This was totally lovely! I drove a taxi in San Francisco from 1985-2013 and the spirit of that place (still alive, I like to think) oozes from this piece. (I knew Malcolm Hall in Sandpoint, Idaho, many years ago... anyone who knows what became of him, I'd love to know -- I've often wondered...)On Aug 19, 2020 Rachael wrote:
So when did he get hooked on drugs or why?On Aug 19, 2020 holly wrote:
Perfect for me to read right now. I am always worrying about accomplishing things, this project, that chore. Will I accomplish all I've set for myself in the time that is left... not likely. Maybe I will be able to let go of some of these things, hopefully.On Aug 19, 2020 Meredith wrote:
It was peaceful just reading about it. What an experience!On Aug 18, 2020 Kristy wrote:
What a brilliant experience and view into our real essential "needs" as humans. I hope we can get back to the reality of these basic needs and release our dependence on all the stuff that is consuming earth's resources. Laurie's days sound so full of brilliant being. "you need is what you want" this is true philosophyOn Aug 18, 2020 Marie Altman wrote:
Thank you, thank you for sharing this. What he gave in writing this is an inside glimpse of the effect we have on others; that his listening enabled musicians to hear themselves, that his joy gave others joy in their own work. Beautiful, profound truths described for us, planting seeds in us.On Aug 18, 2020 Eric Dunn wrote:
As we may all be seeing an increase of homelessness in the cities we live in, reading this wonderful piece can help to encourage the expression of compassion and understanding in us all.Thank you!On Aug 18, 2020 Diane J Klish wrote:
Loved this article about a simple man living a simple life. I think I learned something from him about how to look at life differently.On Aug 18, 2020 Claudia wrote:
Wow, this is beautiful. I am glad you were able to share Laurie's thoughts as well as your own feelings towards this unique soul.On Aug 18, 2020 Sr Marilyn Lacey wrote:
Thank you, Richard, for these reflections: yours and Laurie's. Both are extraordinary. Spiritual. Memorable. Laurie's freedom brings St Francis of Assisi to mind.On Aug 18, 2020 Robin Reichert wrote:
It's not often that I take the time to read a long article and I'm glad I did this time! Something called to me about this mystery man. I do believe his magic still holds and I'm grateful he shared this small glimpse into his carefree world. Yes, the world would be better if we realized how much less we need and just sat to observe and appreciate all the beauty around us - to bloom where we're planted. Thank you Laurie and thank you Richard for putting Laurie's priceless words in print!On Aug 18, 2020 Mary wrote:
Thank you for sharing this, Richard. So many different lives...On Aug 18, 2020 Helen C. Gennari wrote:
Thank you, Richard, for sharing this amazingly heart-warming story of meeting Laurie. His writing reveals so much about who he really was. Such a reminder not to judge by what we see and observe. Our perceptions can fall short of reality.On Aug 18, 2020 Grace wrote:
Thank you for sharing a part of Laurie’s story of his life. I was in the Haight in the 60’s, a young hippie living on the streets. Hanging out in Golden Gate park, the FreeU, and Panhandling in the Haight as well as at Fishermen's Wharf. Reading Laurie words brought back many memories of a time where people felt very free and loved. Music played in the park, artists of all kinds, wonderful creative people. I would love to read more of Laurie’s writing.On Aug 18, 2020 Clarence Denbok wrote:
Profound...Beautiful... not beyond a critique of inherent contradictions, e.g., Laurie's beautiful way of being depends on the world he is blessed by and blessing by his presence, i.e, the world of people who are productively engaged - bakers, teachers, artists, engineers and architects, doctors and street cleaners. Nonetheless, we desperately need more beautiful minds, more observers and more free thinkers, and more kindness and love, like Laurie'sOn Aug 18, 2020 Kristin Pedemonti wrote:
Crying and joyful as I read your and Laurie's stories of love, light, connection, and living by one's own terms with deep abandon. First I am so grateful (and I imagine you are too) that you stopped that day in 1956 and allowed yourself the glory of Laurie's company!I am so happy to hear that Laurie was able to overcome and to shine his light so brightly even if only for a short time. It seems he truly understood what it is to be alive. I needed this reminder at this challenging time. I am feeling quick stuck geographically, physically given this pandemic and the limitations currently of face to face contact in the ways Laurie so beautifully described. Oh the joy of human company, even if as Laurie did, on the periphery during his experiment and then so beautifully in his work in Israel.
for me, I long to be in Calgary, a place where I feel my light is able to shine more brightly. And then I remind myself, there are so many glorious ways to connect virtually and to currently slow down and connect with nature. And thus this can be enough. For now.
Thank you again Richard for your eloquence.
On Aug 18, 2020 Patrick Watters wrote:
Connections — it’s what makes the entire Universe, sometimes seen and experienced, other times (mostly) not. We have to slow down to see them. Oh yes, we also have to be willing to engage. We know this don’t we Richard? We are wealthy indeed.On Aug 18, 2020 Susan Curry wrote:
I too knew and befriended a "homeless" woman -- I was amazed at how little regard she gave for her next night's sleeping place, for where her food would come from, for how she would get to some address across town, for whatever she needed. She lost the few things she carried many times by stashing them someplace out of sight, but would return to find them gone. Sometimes she would check into a hospital for a safe night's sleep in a clean bed, and some attention to her basic needs. I helped her at least 3 times replace her ID so she could get access to her bank account which received monthly disability allotments.I remember her stories of many positive and ugly encounters with people. Her heart and happiness to be alive were almost infectious. The quickness to anger when she sensed any injustice, toward her or toward others, was her downfall -- getting her evicted from housing that provided her safety from fear of rape and an address where social services could connect with her. She had an uncanny way of escaping prematurely from every involuntary incarceration to an asylum for evaluation. I asked her to to call me anymore when our phone conversations would devolve into her yelling at some unfair assumption I had made. I could count on hearing from her any next time she was committed. Mine was one of 4 numbers she had committed to memory by heart.
On Aug 18, 2020 Nicola Pitt wrote:
It sounds like Laurie stumbled upon what many Eastern monastics have known for a long time; the increased awareness and unbounded joy that comes from a simple life paired with meditation.Thanks for sharing his story!
On Aug 18, 2020 Rajesh wrote:
Wow! I am struck by the story and all the emotions invoked, visible in comments over the last dozen years. Esp. from family and friends.Allow me to imagine an addition to Laurie's story:
The bakers found the bread rising faster when Laurie was watching. They happily shared a loaf with hi. The fruit sellers sold more fruits on the days Laurie watched the fruits being unloaded. And so, they were happy to share a fruit or two with him. ...
On Apr 3, 2020 Angy Thennes wrote:
Wow! I really enjoyed reading this. His perspective was beautiful and easy to identify with.Thank you!!
On Oct 21, 2019 Mij wrote:
touching, teaching, tender,On Oct 5, 2018 Michael Stilinovich wrote:
Wow !! I relate to this man as my own existence feels as if it was headed on a similar path...Time will tell, if there is any...
On Sep 28, 2017 Art Goodtimes wrote:
ah, as a San Francisco native and former Roman Catholic seminarian who had his life changed after coming home to the Summer of Love after a year as a VISTA on an indian reservation in montana, laurie's story rings so true. the Sixties were a time when a number of Lauries flowered. some wilted. drugs took some away. but many of us, like Laurie in Israel, found enlightened principles that we incorporated into our lives. we've learned to live in a wonderful balance of freedom and responsibility. i still attend Rainbow Gatherings to drink at that liberating Haight-Ashbury fountain. bless you, laurie. your story is a continuing inspiration, even with its rough spots. heroes are only human.On Jun 27, 2017 Craig Downer wrote:
This sure takes me back to the "good old days".On Jul 25, 2016 Molly wrote:
Also, it is beautiful to see how this article has woven a thread for Laurie's family... a golden thread of its own making, and yet catalyzed in ways by your sharing, which obviously has ignited something. Thank youOn Jul 25, 2016 Molly wrote:
This has moved me so deeply. Will you share more of the manuscript Laurie wrote?On Jul 19, 2016 gsp wrote:
my only reaction to this article is an inability to use words--beside the ones in this sentence.On Jun 10, 2016 Aaron White wrote:
I am so overwhelmed by this article. I did not know of it's existence until recently (a few weeks ago). Wonderful writing -and thank you Richard Whttaker !! I am a son of Laurie Seagel's. My name is Aaron White and I was born in Indio California in 1960. My birth name was actually "Aaron Vincent Seagel" ... later (@ 3 years old) I was adopted by a stepfather...'Paul White'. Laurie had met my birth mother in San Francisco. I am 56 know, and have just returned from a trip to LA where I met two half brothers 'Laurie's' for the first time... along with his sister, Leila Price... an amazing and wonderful experience!! I've often wondered throughout my life...why am I so spiritually oriented...etc?...(also growing up during the '70s)...Well... one can imagine I suppose...not wanting to divulge too many details ??!! But I have here with me (sent to me a few years ago by his sister) a copy of that manuscript Laurie had written from which an excerpt is here in Richard's article. In it's entirety -- it is absolutely "Mind-Blowing" !! What an exceptionally intelligent and deeply perceptive man was Laurie Seagel !! And a gifted writer also !! I wish I could share the whole thing with you all right here!! But thank you again Richard -- for this awesome share you have done with the world !! I am proud to be (though I'd only briefly met him once) a son of Laurie Seagel !!On Jun 9, 2016 Suzanne Nieman wrote:
Laurie was my husband Michael's biological father. My husband was born in 1955, the product of a brief marriage. Another son was born to Laurie a few years later, Aaron. Apparently Laurie never mentioned his two sons to you, but he had very little contact with them for many years. Having a family in Israel helped straighten him out. We are close with that family now and dearly love them. I never got to meet Laurie but had one lovely telephone conversation with him shortly before he died. He definitely possessed a charm that impacted many. Thanks for sharing your experience!On Jun 3, 2016 Leona wrote:
Laurie is my great uncle, I never knew anything about him until now. Thanks for teaching me more about him, you definitely know more about him then I do.On Aug 22, 2015 Beth wrote:
This morning, something reminded me of Laurie and I decided look him up online. It's good to know this side of him and how his life evolved. When I met him in the early '60s on Perry Lane in a house next door to where Ken Kesey was writing "...Cuckoo's Nest," he seemed to be homeless—going from place to place as "hosts" decided it was time for him to move on. I was attracted to his quirky sense of humor and free spirit. Sometimes he seemed to be trying to make people feel uncomfortable on purpose. Because of that, he may have been asked to leave. Perhaps that's when he went to San Francisco.On Aug 9, 2015 Lynn rosen wrote:
Thank you for sharing this. I lived near where you and Laurue write about, a few years after the time period described. His intention and life story is very moving. It also describes the dilemma, I find between seeking, and listening, as well as trying to live with openness and how, at some point it can open one up too much to find enough of oneself, to remember what one was seeking initially.On Aug 8, 2015 Harish wrote:
A person is judged by what the person has more than by what the person is.A person judges his/her own happiness on what the person has and not is as a human being.
In this environment where being is less important than doing and having, Laurie would have a tough job getting his life style understood. Being followed is not even on the horizon.
It would be wonderful if it did come to pass.
On Jan 20, 2015 Kevin wrote:
Fabulous story lived and retold .On Nov 19, 2014 Birrell Walsh wrote:
It so strongly reminds me of Thoreau. Why is it so rare for us to actually practice a thought, to put a life-view into a life? I say this without reproach. Actually I say it with some embarrassment...On Nov 2, 2014 Manissa Buenavista wrote:
KEEP GOING. Walk your Talk. Its all about commitment!On Aug 4, 2014 Mary wrote:
How extraordinary to know what you want (need) and to sacrafice eveything to attain it and even spread it along to others. What a gift.A story that should never end.
On Dec 31, 2013 bobwallenberg wrote:
Very interesting. My birthplace being San Francisco - Lowell High (then in the Haight Ashbury) and having friends who worked in The Produce District, Laurie's piece got to me. A life I would never choose, but of great psychological meaning. As I graduated in 1950' the beatnik life was just beginning. I managed to escape to suburbia and now live a peaceful life up North. Thanks for bringing back wonderful memories. Truly a random act of kindness.On May 22, 2013 letha white wrote:
I spend as little time as possible on the internet. No blogs. Only an occasional dip into wikipedia. But somehow this site with your experience of The City and Laurie popped up on my computer. I don't usually respond to the rare appearance of articles and essays. But your voice has a quality of one-on-one conversation that I cannot resist. I am tempted to carry on and tell you stories of living in The City from 1940 through high school, Polytechnic, in the 1950s and visiting the not yet discovered Haight in 1976. I know the donut shop you talked about and saw the changes to my old stomping grounds in the neighborhood. But I won't. Thanks for this piece about your experience of meeting and sharing with Laurie.On May 19, 2013 Neeti wrote:
Thanks for sharing this story, though I have read it after 5 years it has touched me.He surely did live a life of a true human being...
On Feb 17, 2013 Mohamed Said wrote:
Thank you for sharing the story of a unique personality who loved this universe and its inhabitants, led an ascetic life and left this world in oblivion while his felllow beings compete for wordly pleasures and remain restlessMoOn Nov 14, 2012 Art wrote:
Fantastic. Something for us all to live and learn from.On Jul 29, 2012 Sapphire wrote:
How beautiful...On Jun 2, 2012 luv4all wrote:
Even while reading this story, most of us are either trying to learn from this or be judgemental. How can we ever be carefree, look, listen and feel peaceful within. It's all about having the patience, acceptance and smile for as it comes in life and living each moment fully.On May 25, 2012 John Cooper wrote:
I like it. It was also good for me. It remains special and I can't remember leaving the 60's and the happiness behind, but family life and occupation nipped at my heals, and I joined up. Ah, but I'm so glad for sharing those golden years. It seems mostly gone in the 2012's. [Or i9s it just me?]On May 25, 2012 Sierra Salin wrote:
This made me cry. Life is simple, meanwhile most of us hop in, turn the key, drive on and consume away, living behind beliefs which we rarely challenge, while time and life , pass on by. The incredible beauty of the air, water, soil, and each other, are all around, if we but stop and be present.On May 7, 2012 Bob wrote:
I like non- linier thinkingOn Apr 8, 2012 Pisqually Hill wrote:
Wonderful to know ya can get by on less than you think!On Mar 25, 2012 deborah b wrote:
thank you, pay attention be aware, i love how the jazz musicians picked up on it and how they all resonated in the moment when they perceived it for its fullness. talikg it into 2012 seems that we need to activate that mutuality in order to save our sanity and get the human species on track to align with nature and our higher beingness, that of "upstairs" brain thinking. This story adds to the new discourse. Thank you, again.On Feb 28, 2012 poornima wrote:
Its really good to know how little we need to be happy!On Jan 8, 2012 Pam EL A wrote:
What a wonderful and enriching story. I recalled my father's wisdom about not talking so much after reading this sentence in Laurie’s excerpt: "The more I watched and listened, the more I saw and heard, more keenly, more distinctly."My father phrased it like this:
Wise old owl sitting in the oak
The more he heard, the less he spoke
The less he spoke, the more he heard
Why can't you be like that wise old bird?
However, being wise is not an exemption from human frailties.
On Dec 13, 2011 Kathleen @work wrote:
Thank your for sharing this uplifting excerpt! Poignantly familiar.... & a powerful 'reminder' of our conceived needs...what a story and also, such a sweet face, our Laurie!!On Dec 12, 2011 Phyllis wrote:
I think that Laurie is an angel who came to teach us about what is possible. The potential is boundless when we can throw off the conditioning we carry and go inward to our source. Thank you so much for this story and the gifts it brings. Many blessings to you and yours ....On Aug 18, 2011 Glenda wrote:
What a beautiful, beautiful story, how very sad that this amazing man was treated as most people treat street people... as dredges of the earth.....such a waste of an amazing opportunity to have been there and know this person..there are more people out there than you might imagine perhaps we should all look into the eye of the next unclean, disheveled, un-kept person and smile and perhaps give them a word or two to make them feel that... they are in that moment.... of value......... we can learn from Laurie's story.... but what a miracle to find a "Laurie" and to learn from them.On Apr 5, 2011 Zach wrote:
Okay, and at what point did he discover that some of the few things he needed was amphetamines, crime, and dirty needles?On Jan 25, 2011 Chris Newton wrote:
Amazing to find this. I remember the guy well, but I remember him as the crazy guy who always jumped up onstage at the free concerts in the Panhandle and played air guitar and was embarrassing to watch, like he thought he was contributing something but he was contributing nothing. I always assumed he was a gone speed freak or else had just permanently flipped out. Crazy, you know? Mentally ill. It wasn't uncommon in the Haight, a lot of crazies drifted in. So it's amazing to me to learn at this late date so much about him I never dreamed of.On Apr 26, 2010 reid wrote:
One thing I don't understand, if life was so great, why did he revert from a life of quiet contemplation and start using amphetamines? It just doesn't make sense. Once you find inner peace, I wouldn't think you would let it go.On Jul 26, 2009 happyseaurchin wrote:
a rare insight to a brave soulthanks
also liked the comments
check out mar 31 2009
be well!
On May 26, 2009 Dave wrote:
I too went to school with him and he was always open to everyone and happy. He seemed to want to bring joy to everyone he met. We (most) have started life with problems finding our selves, until we come to our self and realize our calling. Laurie did this and this is what life is all about, how we finish it for the glory to God. He reminds me of the Prodigal and thank God he repented and found himself in the end.On Mar 31, 2009 sagi seagel wrote:
i am lauries first born son in israel.(my older sister hadar came first)my father passed away when i was eleven.i will never forget the multitude of crowds that attended his funeral with broken hearts and amazing stories...i came to the states at 21 and ended up in san francisco roaming the same streets and living in the same areas that laurie once did.i spent a magical year there,walking a lot and feeling my dads spirit everywhere.i even met some pepole that rememberd him.its a bit of a shock but not really surprising to see my dad emerge on cyber space and still touch pepole so deeply so long after he is gone...thank you so much richard...On Mar 30, 2009 ann gitlis wrote:
I was fortunate to know Laurie his second part of his life while he lived in Israel . I actually knew him from his childhood as my brother Fred and Laurie were good friends. I had such a crush on this good-looking smart and full of life guy, but of course he never knew it.... But we met againwhen I also moved to Israel and our families said we must get together.... which we did, and spent so much time together. He had two more children....another son, and a daughter who was two years old when Laurie past away.... He helped so many people in Israel as he worked in the drug program and knew the problems his clients were going through.. They all showed up at his funeral with glowing stories and how Laurie helped them... Laurie died as he lived... I was fortunate enough to be with him his last days on this earth... He smiled as each friend came to visit him at the hospital. He never let on that he was dying (of course he knew),, and asked if the children "knew the condition he was in".... He spoke about visions to the next world and at that moment he felt someone in Russia was being born (don't know what this meant) but he had no fear of leaving this earth. His friends in Israel go to his grave once a year and it is now22 years since he is gone...His oldest son lives in California with his wife and new child.. His second son is studying in Israel and his oldest daughter lives in a lovely town in ISrael with her husband and two children... and the
youngest daughter is in israel studying... Talila the most wonderful wife has kept the family together and Lauries memory quite alive...He has touched us all.
On Mar 12, 2009 Jon wrote:
I too went to high school with Laurie. I found him to very intelligent and personable. My own search for truth was similar until I looked within my heart and found I was in good company. His story is very touching and hopefully will influence others to continue the search.On Mar 11, 2009 Harry wrote:
I went to high school with Laurie. He was a very special guy even then - insprirational, courageous, happy and friendly, super-smart and very popular. We shared a couple of road trips together, and I could see he was one of a kind. He married Barbara and had a son while at Stanford, played freshman football there in spite of his short stature and lack of experience in high school ball, and then I lost track of him. We Oakland High people knew that he had died, but I never heard the circumstances. I'm so glad he touched so many lives in San Francisco and in Israel, as he touched mine and most of my friends as well. He was joy itself.On Jan 16, 2009 Roger wrote:
Nice tale of a contemporary (relatively) urban hermit, a 20th century Han Shan. I wonder if the nexus of currents that combined in SF in the 50's-60's are again brewing, and if so where? Let's bring it.On Jan 15, 2009 Simon wrote:
Great story. Please make the rest of his manuscript available. Sounds like this guy had important wisdom to share. Maybe this is a book that needs to be published.On Dec 12, 2008 Cazpillz wrote:
I'm 15 and this story truly touched me. I rarely experience this when I read stories, but this one is different. The saying is true that one man can make a difference in the world.On Dec 7, 2008 Philip wrote:
"...imagine all the people, living life in peace..."John L.On Nov 11, 2008 Alvin Romarate wrote:
Laurie's story is a wake up call to all those who work without taking a breather, to those who think they will live forever, can you tell me where were you from the last 20 years of your life?.On Nov 5, 2008 Truth wrote:
He was a bum. If everyone lived like that who would provide the bread and fruit he ate? Who would he watch work? We'd be a bunch of monkeys staring at each other and starving to death.What a waste.
On Nov 4, 2008 Matthew Baer wrote:
I truly enjoyed this piece. Is there any way I can obtain a copy of "All Men Shall Be Gods"? Is it posted anywhere on the internet?On Nov 4, 2008 Santiago wrote:
Every time I see a "homeless" person I ask myself what's going on in their minds. Usually the answer is that they are somehow crazy, isolated in their own mind and abducted from common human relations. But once in a while we hear about people like Laurie and i think about them a little and realize that they comprehend better than me what life and being human is about. And it's about living an enjoying everything around us. Why we don't know this? Because we are all lose in the conventions, the habits and the almost directed life the world around establishes. But we can be lucky sometimes, and found stories like Laurie's, and for some time, try to enjoy the world like people like Laurie does.Thank you very much for sharing this, i'm kind of trying to share my experiences too, i am only beginning but if someone can take a few minutes reading and maybe making a comment i would be honored.
Thank You again.
(see link)
On Oct 31, 2008 kathy wrote:
my brother thom lived this way for as long as i could remember. he was a very great man. loving inspirational and selfless. everyone called him a loser, a bum, but i knew better. it's nice to know that he was not the only man out there that learned to just appreciate. miss thom, and i am sure Lauries family misses him. maybe they have met in heaven as i know surely they are both there.On Oct 31, 2008 George Palmer wrote:
Interesting, but where's the novelty? He was some kind of bum, anyway. For that part of his life he lived simply.In life, some choices are up to ourselves; Laurie's choice is affordable by anyone, if young enough. Anyway, thanks for sharing: it is important to remember that no life style is "the right one".
On Oct 29, 2008 Shane Pahara wrote:
Inspiring... Truly inspiring!!On Oct 24, 2008 Harley Rider wrote:
I have lived that life , and I have tried many others . I find that different times in my life , I want different experiences . So I have followed my gut feelings . I now feel at one with myself riding my bike . Life is short , so I want to experience what I can , and to help out other people in there journey through life .On Sep 11, 2008 Becky Brook wrote:
truly human, seems he was no stranger.On Sep 6, 2008 Dinesh Kr... wrote:
It's a very interesting ,helpful for any one to make his/her career...On Sep 6, 2008 imran zaka wrote:
It is good.On Aug 31, 2008 Akber wrote:
Simply Brilliant!! Truly as expressed in Laurie's words, what he experienced cannot be understood and neither could he explain it...but his life has shown us the part to living in divine presence every moment!!On Aug 31, 2008 John Giles wrote:
I was a classmate of Laurie's. We did not have a personal friendship, beyond competition during intramural play during sixth period gym @ Oakland High. However, Laurie struck me as a good guy.He was confident, without being self absorbed. Laurie achieved something most of us will not, during our lifetime. He was satisfied with himself. He escaped the drug trap. He experienced the love of a woman.His death did not end his life.
On Aug 9, 2008 samyukta wrote:
often said and rarely realised are the words "Happiness lies within oneself".. Laurie has practically demonstrated it to us.. And the world is as we look at it.. Laurie's words have indeed taught me to realise and appreciate the goodness around me..On Aug 8, 2008 pradeep wrote:
it's very heart touching, story has taken me into the world which is pactical. the relam of the story ,is sedimented in my mind which cannot be vanished or removed.On Aug 5, 2008 nikunj pandey wrote:
very simple and beautifull story of a soul. wish i can also live in that way ,carefree,careless. just tuned in to me and world giving away all sins and negativity. cheers to laurieOn Jul 10, 2008 sugandh wrote:
THANKS FOR THIS...On Jul 10, 2008 pradeep wrote:
I feel laurie showed us a way to live life by just looking and listining we all have it but laurie used itOn Jul 5, 2008 Mohammad Abul Basher wrote:
Thanks to all who had broutht the writiing for us."I was joyous watching the beauty of existence" what a saying!On Jun 18, 2008 FRIEDA wrote:
good loved itOn Jun 17, 2008 Jude wrote:
Wow! Thanks so much for this great story. I found this magazine in a google alert about gift economy. This for me says more about gift than any other speculation I have read or tried.On Jun 14, 2008 mreenal wrote:
GREAT.....TOUCH MY HEART....On Jun 5, 2008 DILIP wrote:
i like your conversationsOn Jun 2, 2008 simi wrote:
well..... this conversation really got me into tears and at the same time made me realise how important it is to be urself... and what u think is right... n most importantly what is actually important to be happy.... is to be self content... and dont look for happiness...its within you... how you see it as....really great....On May 29, 2008 pramod wrote:
Thank you for posting the story. Interesting for me in many ways because I lived rough in SF for some months in the early 70s. The "valuable insights" versus "feeloader" debate is always an interesting one. We are all stakeholders whether we like it or not, something we did not fully appreciate in the 60s. Even so, I am happy to support some of the Laurie's of the world, from time to time. Perhaps the most interesting thing for me, is why Laurie "descended" into drug dependency, if his 'wandering cloud' existence was so good. Does he explain this in his other writings? I suspect he got lonely, I know I did. It turns out, belonging is more important than we give it credit for. May I post Laurie's story on my site? www.praxispath.co.ukOn May 22, 2008 Pushpendra wrote:
It is really superb and i got which i had necessacity.On May 12, 2008 manoj wrote:
you know and not act on what you know is equal to not knowingOn May 2, 2008 ammad wrote:
every thing is possibleOn Apr 25, 2008 sakshi wrote:
i just feel that the title laurie gave to his book is so appropriate. man can be a human and yet become a god. and he doesnt need to even sacrifice a lot for that. just the simple act of appreciating the great life one has is all that it takes.this excerpt also brings forth, the view of many of our ancestors, that the life they lived, a life of simplicity without the complexity of machines and technology, is a much happier and fulfilling life. :)
On Apr 7, 2008 slavica wrote:
this is exactly what I am searching for...On Apr 6, 2008 ajit wrote:
Let's cull out the druggie portion and look and try to appreciate the concept of 'appreciation of life' in all its beauty and as well as ugliness. Its worth a try, that's how I feel about the whole thing. In fact many of us do visit the wilderness with a fishing rod, a book, a girl or even a gun.On Mar 27, 2008 tanveer wrote:
i am very impressed.On Mar 5, 2008 prakash puskar wrote:
Dear readerNow we are going in to hell ,but a person who wants to remove you & try to save from it.what is evil in it?so just go now and turn it too far,then you are the best.
On Mar 1, 2008 Searby wrote:
Thank you for posting the story. Interesting for me in many ways because I lived rough in SF for some months in the early 70s. The "valuable insights" versus "feeloader" debate is always an interesting one. We are all stakeholders whether we like it or not, something we did not fully appreciate in the 60s. Even so, I am happy to support some of the Laurie's of the world, from time to time. Perhaps the most interesting thing for me, is why Laurie "descended" into drug dependency, if his 'wandering cloud' existence was so good. Does he explain this in his other writings? I suspect he got lonely, I know I did. It turns out, belonging is more important than we give it credit for. May I post Laurie's story on my site? www.praxispath.co.ukOn Feb 27, 2008 dlf420 wrote:
Reminds me of when I was a child.On Feb 26, 2008 theturk wrote:
It's delusional to romanticise such a person. he was just a plain nice guy with a drug problem who abused his intelligence and sensitivity in some sublime narcissistic dramatization of something he believed was 'spiritual'. A real pity.On Feb 25, 2008 ken wrote:
Yeah! this was a moment where i felt the same in some very tiny part of my busy life. The greatest and most happiest place is how u enjoy that wonderful moment , while u are listening, u tend to think of next thing to do, i say stop let listen this wonderful splendid moment even to listening and wacthing his or hers gesture and reveal more and more splendid talk which i always miss out. At theend of the day i felt the place that i felt being the greatest moment is when i start enjoy the moment of watching and listening and be fully present and hold the task that we want to do if it is less important.I realize what we give up listening to make some money out of it and then to buy thing to get happiness, at the end that thing dont give happiness, we always miss that moment that is the true happiness,the task is thejourney to happiness and not seek to the destination for happiness.On Feb 24, 2008 ND Jones wrote:
Smile, a nice read. rest in peace, Laurie.On Feb 23, 2008 Al wrote:
Poignant as these reflections are, in the end it's a young man's idyll. Laurie was a kid, we all were kids and could simply rely on the perfect and infallible energy that is given to the young. It's sublime to realize you need only sun and air to survive, but it's also a temporary state of being, an illusion, like the feeling of never needing to eat again after a big meal. I don't see much wisdom in Lauries tale, just an adventurous boy who might have once been interesting, but seemingly became a casualty. I'm old now and once lived in shanties without running water or heat and the like, but now I don't and would shortly die if I tried I'm sure. So god bless Laurie and all his kind who came and went so quickly, and god bless me for not being one of them..On Feb 22, 2008 Kristina wrote:
Laurie experienced (unconventionally) what God wants for us. "Be Still and Know that I am God" Psalm 46:10 Unless you experience the chaos of life, you cannot appreciate the peace.On Feb 21, 2008 Tim wrote:
Wow,I "stumbledupon" this story and it was a great piece.You should seriously think about having his book published.On Feb 21, 2008 Judy wrote:
Laurie sounds like he was a nice guy; too bad he was a druggie.On Feb 21, 2008 bill wrote:
what a load of bollocks.On Feb 20, 2008 go wrote:
it is a short and long story telling how we became distant from "life" day by day. everything depends on everything and men shall be a god to decide who is parasite and who is not.On Feb 19, 2008 joseph wrote:
I agree with K, but also partially with ben. This is, after all, just a story.However, parasitism is hardly the word for someone who gets a free loaf of bread, some fish, and a couple donuts every once and a while. This is definetly not parasitism. Do you hand out free food to your tapeworm? Didn't think so.
On Feb 19, 2008 ben wrote:
r u guys kidding?it's a short story about a hippie junky addict.
You hippes are a tedious lot.
how can you honor such parasitism?
On Feb 19, 2008 K wrote:
I don't think you have to do exactly what he did to get the same sort of experiences. As humans, in the west particularly, we take more than we need...often more than we want as well. I think one could have some things (for instance a place to live, money, a job) and still...get that feeling.On Feb 18, 2008 jack barry wrote:
I think Suzuki Roshi was the Zen Center leader who went off the "one true path", and into some messiness.The moral: Donuts are deceiving, and some Zen leaders are, too.
On Feb 16, 2008 Michael Hudson wrote:
Wanted to add, after reading ChrisF´s comment, (which I apreciate and find very poigniant and true,)that in another ideal that is reality, we are always perfect. becoming conscious of this grand perfection is our momentarily acheivable task.On Feb 16, 2008 Michael Hudson wrote:
Thanks for the Laurie story. What great cultural references too! Alpert, Joplin, and Roshi too! Who wouldn´t end up enlightened with that crowd? (although also perhaps at times an influence towards the amphetamines.)I don´t consider the samatic state to which he arived in such youth an ultimate acheivement by any means. He missed the Dharma. Being content with the beauty of existance and not needing anything is a very healthy place, but all it takes to arive is adopting the habit of renouncement. Without the element of heart felt actions, he remained a self-endulgent wanderer, humble though his ego-centric actions may have been. Many of us pass through this phase and reach the realisation of action. Constant involvement in change is the only function of worldly existance whether we choose to take part or not. Without inviting change we soon wither and die of stagnation, be it blissfull or remorsefull. On the topic, I recomend the Argentinian movie, "un Buda." I beleive that from what Laurie was doing with his life when he did die, he may well have acheived a state of samadhi that included a much more profound and better integrated peace of mind.
On Feb 15, 2008 joe wrote:
i lived that way brief periods when young. Now I am sorry I believed all the liars from the hippy period, but i remember living very much like laurie and having the moments of intense perception he describes.later it just became me a member of the vast sea of homeless, and i hated it.
the moments, indeed days and weeks, of awareness and blissful disregard for all but the immediate were available in that way really only at the time and for people of a certain age.
it took this page to jog my memory of the romantic, pleasant bits that the evil years had all but erased.
I wish I had the presence of mind back then to destroy my body so I wouldnt have to be alive at this age listening to the hypocrisy of the hippies who act now as if they only ever wanted to be rich and famous while convincing drugged youth to OBEY the great rock roll homo conspiracy
On Feb 14, 2008 DocHollow wrote:
Thank you..I think we all need to do this at some point in our lives. Maybe not to this degree, but we can all find something similar in our own way.On Feb 13, 2008 Dideamon wrote:
I've done something like this and it really opens your mind. I wish everyone could experience going on a journey like this. Leave everything you know for 1 week, walk out the front door with the clothes on your back and try to make it for 1 week, you will know more about yourself and the world. The first things you need to find is something to store water in. :) Walk barefoot if you don't mind people staring at you and walk on the grass.On Feb 13, 2008 DeAnna wrote:
Although Laurie went to extremes to achieve his fulfillment what he was able to express can be appreciated by all of us. Perhaps it was his attempt to reach this blissful state while living in the real that drove him to experiment with drugs...we are very lucky to have the knowledge we can gain this fulfillment with neither drugs nor removing ourselves from society. In Israel' apparently' Laurie did find the way. He was able to share his vision for the brief years he had left. Thank You for sharing Laurie's vision with us.On Feb 13, 2008 ChrisF wrote:
Interestingly, as I got to the bottom of the comments, people start to address the other side of "holiness"... perfection is not static... what drove Laurie to drug addiction (and yes, hepatitis was from the needles.) But, this is just confirming that we all have access to a spiritual life even in our (middle class) daily lives. Ebb and Flow, there is no stasis. sometimes we're enlightened, and at another time just depressed. Sometimes we're perfect, but only for a minute!On Feb 13, 2008 Michael wrote:
A more balanced path is better - life can be enjoyed in the present without condemning ourselves to a miserable death. He created three children and left them with a father they would never remember.On Feb 12, 2008 dobbs_head wrote:
We forget physical constraints so easily. He died of hepatitis destroying his liver. How do you think he contracted it? It wasn't the meth, it was living outside and exposing himself in that manner. While his writing seems idealic, his lifestyle sent him to an early grave. The world is harsh, and it won't quit being that way for anybody.On Feb 11, 2008 jarrod wrote:
I truly feel moved but saddened. Everyone here was so taken aback by this story they missed the other side - if it wasnt for the people not living for the sake of life then laurie wouldnt have had any such experience, not to mentioned starved. Beautiful but constrained. I do appreciate this on a deep level, but felt the need to point out how flawed and unattainable our perception of happiness is.On Feb 11, 2008 Colin wrote:
I read something yesterday that said we are all spoiled for choice these days. You would think that all the choice we have, be it where you want to drive to this weekend, what colour of top youd like to wear or what mortgage you think suits you best, give us freedom. Although we are free to choose between any given object, we are never happy with the choices we make. Perhaps if we forgo these options - which are always forced upon us one way or another - we can live a happier, more worth while existence. Instead of concentrating on the new quick trends - how about something as timelessly wonderful as birdsong instead of ipod music, (who has the perfect playlist) or peoplewatching instead of contrived film, (dont we all think we could devise a better picture or story in our own mind). Laurie conciously let go of his options, and made a life of necessity - yet found himself all the happier for it. Bravo.On Feb 10, 2008 Mark wrote:
I haven't the words to express my feelings - LaurieOn Feb 9, 2008 ollie wrote:
yesOn Feb 9, 2008 Rose wrote:
Laurie practice exactly what Buddhism teaches..to find fulfillment/contentment in a very simple thing we have..we can't probably do literally what he done because we have family to support but we are to oblige ourselves to clear our minds constantly from impending worries and questions.. we have to find time to meditate everyday to activate our right brain where I believe our Higher Self resides-Laurie defines as God within us.. Thanks my friend for sharing Laurie's life with us..On Feb 8, 2008 Stutz wrote:
This is a wonderful story. We could all learn so much by slowing down a little bit and appreciating existence a lot more.Nevertheless, as meager as Laurie's needs were, I can't help but think about all the hard work the people who built and maintained the city had to put in so that Laurie could sit back and enjoy it. How much food had to be produced to feed those hard workers so that there was even a little left over to hand out to Laurie. How kind those hard workers were to not feel resentment towards someone who contributed little more than a familiar smile to the society that supported him.
It appears that, in the end, he did apprehend that his 60s lifestyle was a luxury paid for by the hard work of strangers. It's great to hear that Laurie's story ends with him doing something substantial by giving back and helping others.
On Feb 7, 2008 Matt wrote:
very pureOn Feb 7, 2008 Marla wrote:
Amazing.Thank you.
And thank Laurie. :)
On Feb 6, 2008 Anon wrote:
You know, I started reading this - heard about it on Nonduality.com - and I thought, this guy (Laurie) is a nutcase. How prejudice that reaction! Sure enough, I find myself engrossed in the tale, especially when reading Laurie's own words. Truly beautiful. Why can't we all try that lifestyle for a few days? I plan to. Experience is so much more powerful that theory. Peace Laurie, and thanks Richard for sharing this.On Feb 4, 2008 James D. Newman wrote:
I would guess that anyone could do it for 24 hours, just to see. It is a very threatening thought isn't it. What if you liked it, and still felt you had to come back. But it's a deeper fear even than that -- what if you realized that the whole trip that you are on and invested in was bullshit -- and here you have worked so hard for it, are suffering so much for it -- and it's just a trip! The fear that opens when we confront a text like "All Men Shall Be Gods" is deep deep fear.On Feb 3, 2008 Tbear wrote:
Smell the roses, take the time, the road not taken, just look at all the life we miss.On Jan 30, 2008 salaam wrote:
People forget about life in all the rush. Laurie definitely experienced things that many of us will barely scratch.On Jan 30, 2008 Rolland wrote:
"But his freedom from worry about what others might think is one of his qualities"If only......we all could
On Jan 30, 2008 Joe wrote:
"With a family to support, this kind of life is not possible"It's all a matter of degree my friends. Laurie did what he had to do to achieve this sense of awareness. We can benefit from his experience so we don't need to spend our lives free from commercial constraint in order to attain his awareness.
Read what he says:
"Every day I gained more and more pleasure from this listening and looking, always seeing and hearing more clearly. As time went on, I appreciated how glorious and beautiful existence is, living."
Look. Listen. Be aware of how beautiful this world is. Watch in awe at the awesome sense of order that is present in this ever-chaotic world. What is coincidence? Every little thing that you can recognize is coincidence by the fact that you've seen it! See two people shake hands and smile. It's coincidence that you noticed it.
Unless you were looking for it.
On Jan 30, 2008 Sean wrote:
Thanks for this.On Jan 30, 2008 Brad4d wrote:
The memories I have of this face is related to a man in pants that looked like leather they were so dirty and so was the man, the awe & respect he generated seemed like performance art because the pants were all he wore whenever I saw him in Sausalito or the City, the equal reaction to how dirty his appearance, was how clear his being felt revelatory.On Jan 29, 2008 amit singh wrote:
"happiness is in being not becoming " -Nisargduttalaurie reminds me of this .he was what in india they call to be a parivajra , one who spends time to find himself although he was hardly conscious of it .a truly noble being
.If anyone liked this account he/she would surly appreciate a book "I AM THAT" of Nisargdutta Maharaj (its a compilation of talks".Please read it ...amit
On Jan 29, 2008 Samson wrote:
What an inspiration! Do they allow goyim in kibbutz?On Jan 29, 2008 Matt Simpson wrote:
Great story about a courageous man...it was told with a lot of heart and empathy...thanks for sharing.On Jan 29, 2008 Kenneth Stein wrote:
Language imprints one with the concepts upon which the language was founded. While Sanskrit describes reality, Latin and its progeny are based on the factitious creation of reality. Laurie seemed to in fact escape the confines within which so many of us cognitively reside.On Jan 29, 2008 Govinda wrote:
Serenity flows in the narration of Laurie about his daily activities. Yes, it should be possible for people to live with simple wants. Then the society will become enjoyable entity for all. It is so simple to say but it is formidable to act the way Laurie did. But we can to some extent limit our wants to make the posterity happy and happier. I have decided to start working on this model in a limited way.On Jan 29, 2008 Imran Shahid wrote:
Striking! This is an extraordinary peiece of personal experience, pregnant with philosophical thoughts. One cannot stop thinking of bringing an end to one's personal miseries and woes; how exquisite it is to differeniate between need and want and conquering the selfish-self by curtailing one's wish-list.On Jan 28, 2008 Michelle wrote:
I have been believing that i can help make this world a better place for quite some time, as i teacher a am honoured to touch the lives of a few but i want to do more. I teach in KL, Malaysia, an amazing job which i am giving up to do just as Laurie speaks of. help people, "sit more quietly and look, listen, feel. People could live better that way and that society would be better, life would be better that way."This week i fly to Cambodia. I plan to take few clothes, no trappings, little money and just sit, breath, look and feel!
Just one person can change the world...
On Jan 28, 2008 Saoirse wrote:
A beautiful, thought-provoking piece. Laurie was a blessing and blessed, for all of his hardships, and I'm glad that at least this portion of his writings made it onto the site. The world would be a better place if more people tried to be so aware of those around them. Thank you for posting this.On Jan 28, 2008 Maureen Flanagan wrote:
Laurie was a unique human being that saw and heard nature like many of us will never hear. It was an inspiring story and he was richer than many people i.e. in listening, observing and looking at the wonders of this magnificent universe. I; like many of you observe cars coming and going, people walking swiftly to their destination. It is their life that they are creating and I am creating my own. The beauty of nature and flowers and birds, so many colours, the fruit Laurie saw at the markets place. People busy buying and selling. People from all walks of life and from many nations. I hope each and every one of us have a bit of Laurie within us to truly stop and see the absolute wonder and beauty of this world. The co-incidences that occur! Are they reallty co-incidences, I really don't think so. There is so much about this world we will never fully understand but enjoy each day just like Laurie. Everyone has a different life and different gifts to share and we all hope that at times we can help a stranger and touch their heart and move on leaving the seeds behind to grow and that they will in turn go on to touch another stranger's heart. Just being born into this universe is just so incredible and amazing. My mother tried to abort me three times and when I was sixteen I searched for her and found her. I told her I wasn't here to judge her I was here to love her. Due to my journey being placed in an orphanage my wonderment of this world and seeing the beauty is more than a miracle to me. Being born into this world is such a gift.Thank you for such a beautiful story about Laurie he enjoyed life to the absolute and I hope we are all more aware just listening carefully to someone and to music or whatever inspires us. Be like Laurie never fear trying to use your gifts and talents. It is better to fail than not to have tried.
Thank you Laurie you have touched my heart.
Maureen.
Maureen Flanagan. author of Along the Way.
On Jan 28, 2008 Shirley wrote:
I also had to print this one,I meditate every day and it has shown me. What Laurie had, was a gift from God and all of my wishing and praying or meditateing will never give me a mind like his. Your stoy has encouraged me to be faithful to my quite time and be greatful for what I have and not what I want.On Jan 28, 2008 Diane wrote:
Laurie was a modern day St. Francis of Assisi....Thank you so very much for sharing this story. I also will print this one out...On Jan 28, 2008 Karen wrote:
This is one of those pieces that I had to print out, so that I can read it when life seems overwhelming and responsibilities weigh heavy. It really IS something to aspire to, Laurie's life is such an example for us all, even if we're only able to hope for a day, or an hour that we can find peace and joy in living. He really lived.On Jan 28, 2008 PamJam wrote:
As an educator in teaching elementary children to look and appreciate the world around them, Lauire's written message should be paired with the message of the young man who also went "into the wild"...and found his inner peace.On Jan 26, 2008 Helen Tilston wrote:
Sniff, sob aaahh. I am so moved by this story. Laurie was a winner (the world around him was lost for not embracing this free spirited hunman being). We know he is in Heaven now where he truly deserves to be. St Laurie continue to bless this world with your precious gift of kindness.On Jan 25, 2008 Nipun wrote:
Richard, this is perhaps one of your most touching pieces to date! Thanks for sharing such an incredible story. One has to wonder why the mainstream media never picks up on such stories. ;)On Jan 25, 2008 Liddy wrote:
I enjoyed reading this as Laurie had the courage to embrace the simplicity of life with all its senses, life is awesome... sadly, today most of us have forgotten to stop, slow down and smell the roses.On Jan 24, 2008 lisa wrote:
Sometimes we see something or feel something,or get lost in a moment, and catch a glimpse of what we're meant to be living. Laurie knew this, and wasn't afraid to let go and touch it, explore it. To truly understand ourselves and others we need to let go of what we're conditioned to say, or do, or believe. Don't take everyone's word for it...live your own life, and tell your own stories. I admire Laurie... the world is richer for a soul like his.On Jan 23, 2008 jade wrote:
i am touched while reading this....I agree with Laurie..... but if you have a family to support,....
this kind of life is not possible....
On Jan 23, 2008 Ashleigh wrote:
A piece that not only brought me to tears, but has also given me some very substantial topics to mull over. Thank you very much--very, very much-- for sharing Laurie.